Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Not my plan, but His

So yesterday and today through email conversations with the director of waiting children at our agency, I have determined that it is possible our daughter's paper work will not reach them until summer. (so with all the approvals that is needed after they get her file that means it could be late fall/early winter before I think we'd travel) I learn more everytime I ask questions, so I am glad I ask. See, when children are abandoned in China and their paper work is set to begin the process to allow them to become available for adoption, they must first send out an ad in the paper for 60 days. If their family does not come forth and claim them, their paper work for adoption begins which takes a few more months. We think her process is just beginning, even though we thought it did a year ago, it did not.

After being pretty sad about this and feeling sorry about "my plans" for a night, I am determined to live in the now and concentrate on all of my blessings God has already blessed me with. I know that soon I will have high schoolers and more jr. highers....I will continue to poor into them. And honestly, daily I try even harder to be a better mom. I am so glad God gives us a new day every day so I can try again.

AND..... of course, I knew it would be there (before I even looked) when I opened my email devotional today...the verse I had already decided to turn to...yes, can you believe it, it was there! If you don't believe me just go to Joel Osteen's website and check his daily devotion for today the 7th. It always comes through to my email in the middle of the day instead of the morning.

"...Nevertheless, not my will, but Yours, be done"
Luke 22:42

I feel so blessed that God cares about my feelings and what I am going through, and I love that He has a better plan than I do. My heart aches for my daughter, but I know He knows what is best and has a great story to tell with our journey and our lives. For the Glory is all His and for Him alone.

Now, do not let our story get you discouraged for adoption because remember, we are doing this BACKWARDS!!! We saw the little girl we wanted to adopt first. So, we have to WAIT for her paper work to go through. Usually you get all of your paper work started and a lot of times you get your referral even before your dossier is in China! If not, it's usually soon after, for the waiting child list anyway, this is how it happens a lot. These are children with special needs. (remember, we had a call for a referral back in June! We turned it down knowing we were to wait for Lulu) All programs are different, so if you are interested in finding out more about adoption I encourage you to talk to others and also agencies. If I told the agency tomorrow that I wanted a referral now I believe we would have one soon. But, we have not felt God's leading to change our path. I feel more confident than ever, and at total peace that we are to wait for Lulu's file.

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